9 months

Yay! Ripley turned 9 months. Well, technically, her 9 month bday was two and a half weeks ago. But yay for 9 months!
These days the little one is in full steam mode. Everyday there isn't just one new thing but several, and what isn't new gets fine tuned. It's all very fun and exciting and exhausting (at least on the mama front). She has finally graduated to napping on her own which gives me time to eat and shower and check email (you know, the basics). I also finally gave into a baby cage. Chiquita was too fast and clever when she got the crawling thing all figured out. Now she's finding weaknesses in the gate - one day I'm sure I'll find her climbing over it!
Gone are the days when we were waiting for her to do stuff. Here are the days when we are trying to keep up. She is vivacious and happy and super fun. I am bursting with the mama love.

Loving on her Sara (my beautiful Goddess daughter)

She has decided that she loves sand. Beach Betty fo' sho'.

Learning the basics to sand castle building.

Luckily she has a Sara to take her out into the waves (mama likes much warmer water).

On our way to AZ. Four hours in the terminal - chiquita was a trooper.

With her Abuelita - we may have been sad in Tucson, but she did her best to cheer us all up.

Hanging out with Tio Chris.

My auntie and mom introduced her to the mall, specifically the kids play yard. She loved it!

You can tell she was having a great time. 

I call this her tata face. Scrunchy and devious!

Flying with her Uncle Terry. 

With her Tia and her Cousin Dillon (after he decided being a cousin wasn't all that bad)

Uncle Steve has already got this kid thing down!

On our way back to Cali. 

She was so great on the plane. 

Back at home it was business as usual.  Here she was helping daddy correct Z's homework.

When a baby meets Avocado.

This is my favorite dress of the moment.

She is so very close to the walking thing.

As always - she loves her Uncle Dave.

She officially graduated to a big girl carseat this month!

I am not a fan of the tele - but sometimes Big Bird is needed.

She still loves the pool too! 

Before the baby gates - I tried everything to barricade this girl in.

Little stick on earrings make me wanna put holes in her ears for the reals!

Our adventures in food have been quite fun.

So far - she like almost everything :)

My goal is to blog once a week. So far, once or twice a month is the norm. Goals are good things to have. :)

Once again with the death thing.

(August 13th)

My dad died today.
He went in to the VA Hospital for knee surgery and he died.
I'm totally over this whole death thing. Death, if you can hear this, please move along now. Quickly.

(August 14th)

This year is kicking my ass with sadness.  When dad reacted badly to the surgery I immediately thought of flying out.  He didn't want me to go because 1) hospitals are no place for babies, 2) the million degrees that is Arizona right now and 3) he's mostly a no-fuss sort-of guy.  After a couple of days passed and he was still struggling I booked a ticket. I had visitors coming and the monkeys were starting school, so I decided to wait a week before flying out. My dad died unexpectedly yesterday and my flight is today.
I am so sad. I want to start up with all the "what ifs", but Mia taught me that those are futile.


(August 31)

I've spent the week in a sort of bumbling haze. I went to Tucson and stayed with my Tia. Before dad died I had made all these plans to see people. The thought was, I'd visit him in therapy and then make the rounds with the girlie. Once we landed I didn't really know what to do. We went to my sister's house and sat and talked and ate. At my Tia's house we sat and talked and ate. My dad insisted on never having any type of memorial service, so there was nothing really to plan. All of us were just locked in this stunned holding pattern. We woke up every morning and spent the day being thankful for the family and love that we still have. Even if a large part of that family had just slipped away.

I knew three sides of my dad. The first was the tequila drinking, mischievous, short tempered Marine. My parents got divorced when I was around two, so my dad had me on the weekends. However, he never let that stop him from having a good time. I would go to bars and dance halls and backyard poker games, hunting, shooting and we always would dance, dance, dance at weddings. I've heard stories of his high school football jock years (getting away with so much even though my tata was the Chief of Police). He told me about the Marines, and Vietnam, and getting shot and blown up (I have the bullet that went through his leg). He gave me my first drink, and let me smoke cigarettes with him when I was fourteen (and pretending to be tough). He would take me to R-Rated movies and horrors at the Drive-In. He would let me steer the car and shoot his pistol and dust me off whenever I fell or hurt myself. When camping I would get dirty and pee outside and he never made being a girl seem any different from being a boy. He put me on horses bareback and helped me up again after they'd buck me off. I would watch him play pool with his own stick (and he'd win enough money for dinner). He would drink and laugh and eat and tell jokes and enjoy the life he was given.

Despite doing lots of things that made my mom cringe, my dad would spend lots of quiet time with me too. He would take me to church on Sundays, then we'd go home and watch golf. There were lots of visits to museums and galleries followed by picnics in the park. We'd go play golf and he'd have me carry my clubs. We would spend a lot of time with family, I had a handful of cousins my age that share the majority of my childhood memories. We would go to carnivals and fairs and he'd always try to win me a prize. We'd spend hot summer days inside malls, people watching and making up stories as they'd pass by. Dad and my Tia would take us all hiking on holidays, Easter was usually spent by a stream, or at the park. He'd buy me outfits on layaway, and never believed in credit cards. He'd make me over-easy eggs and taught me how not to break the yolk. We would go to car shows and fiestas in the park. He loved mexican music and 50's songs. We would drive for hours just to see where the road would take us. We would go to the Swap Meet and Gem shows and buy treasures. We would dance in the living room and I would stand on his feet. He taught me how to play chess and he never let me win. I don't ever remember him yelling at me or being too angry (even when I lost my tata's ring on a golf course and dad was crushed). I always felt that he loved me and he was proud, no matter what I did.

The summer before I left to college my dad had a serious stroke. He was in his early 40's and it turned him into an old man over night. Some years before that he remarried and I got a new family filled with brothers, sisters and nieces and nephews. I had the chance to see my dad as a husband, and a grandfather. After the stroke he retired, and he had to walk with a cane. His life slowed down, but he still liked to cook and eat and tell jokes. He was stubborn and would try to fix things by himself. He was off balance and always had some sort of cut or scrape (and the most amazing skin that would magically heal). He moved to Rio Rico into a house on three acres of desert. He would drink coffee and make salsa and watch boxing in his chair. He watched me get married, and divorced, and date all the wrong people. He watched me perform, even if it was late at night and crowded. He watched me jump into everything with my whole heart, and he would still brush me off if I fell. Our visits were quieter and calmer, but we would sit and talk and eat and hold hands. He would smile and tell me he loved me. He watched me move to California and become a stepmom. He walked me down the aisle for the second time and held me when Mia died. He loved Ripley and even learned how to Skype with her on his first computer. He got frustrated at his body and hated being slow and achey. He wanted knee surgery so he could move around better and keep up with his newest granddaughter. He wasn't a perfect man, and he wasn't always a good man, but he was a wonderful man. My Papi. I loved him and always felt loved back.

I miss you dad. Take care of Mia for us.

60 year span.

30 years old. 60 years old.

Abuelos

Ripley loves visitors! Her abuelos came to visit again and she was completely smitten. There is nothing like the 'uelita attention she is showered with, but she was also fascinated with her grandpa Johnny this time too! She totally gravitated towards him and made him a teensy bit more comfy with the baby thing. :) I so wish we lived closer to family!

8 months

Life seems busy. I am constantly thinking "after this next task, everything will settle down", and then 5 more things pop up. I'm slowly starting to realize that this is just the new pace. Whew - no wonder I'm looking a bit haggard lately!
Even though it's hectic each new month brings more fun. Ripley spent her seventh month figuring out how to crawl! In the beginning it was this frog jump/belly flop/face plant sort of thing, but she's finally got it all worked out.

Along with crawling she's learned how to sit up longer and pull herself up to standing! She's so excited about all these things! She wants to be mobile so badly, and she refuses to go into the jumper now that she can get around.
She is also very social. She loves to be out and commands attention. She is very friendly and smiles and babbles at people whenever we are out.

We are still figuring out bath time. She wants to move and crawl and play, but I'm so afraid she'll slip. We tried this little bucket, but she only wants to climb out! Oh curious girl.

Everyday I am more in awe and in love with this little girlie. She totally has my heart.

Life is fragile.

Ripley and I were out shopping yesterday and I got scared. In the middle of Target I got scared. I thought that at that moment anyone could harm us if thy chose to. Anyone could shoot us and hurt us. For a fleeting moment I was terrified.
These thoughts were not irrational, extreme, yes, but sane. In that moment I realized the goal of all terrorists: to make people afraid in their daily lives. 


Last year, Gabby Giffords, a Rep. for Arizona, was shot in the head in front of a grocery store I used to shop at. The gunman had her in his sights but killed and injured others as well. The night before last, 12 people were killed (and over 50 more injured), at a movie theatre in Colorado. Everyone there just went to see the new summer blockbuster, never thinking that something so horrific could occur. 


I think about death a lot since Mia died. I felt so safe and untouchable. Now death is the underlying current in my life, a reminding buzz in the background.
I am sad for the friends and families of the victims. When death comes so suddenly, it knocks the wind out of you and reminds you of how vulnerable we are.


Today the President said this (and it made me cry):
"...life is fragile. Our time here is limited and it is precious. And what matters in the end are not the small and trivial things which often consume our lives. It’s how we choose to treat one another, and love one another. It’s what we do on a daily basis to give our lives meaning and to give our lives purpose. That’s what matters. That’s why we’re here.”


xoxo

Fever baby

It's been a rough week here at the casita. Chiquita has spent the last few days at less than her full Rawr! potential. Initially I thought she was having a reaction to pears. We are introducing new foods at snail's pace due to my extensive list of allergies, and this week after pears we noticed that her tummy was acting up. After a few days of super poop she went beyond a food reaction and totally into stomach virus mode. She was feverish and sleepy and only wanted to nurse. I called the nurse and she advised that we just make sure she was hydrated (props to me for restraining and not driving her to an ER).

Her spirits are still good, but now that her tummy is a little better, she has a runny nose and a little cough (which kept us up most of last night). I can vaguely remember all these symptoms just before her teeth popped through. And now that I'm thinking of it, she has been a super drooler lately. Plus, she's been all about the biting - of everything. It's most likely teething, and not some rare disease that they only find in Antarctic naked mole rats. Ok, I'll take us all off of Defcon 1.

Mama love makes it better.

7 months

Wow! The 6th month was such a blur! June was the beginning of summer for the boys, so not only did we have our day to day, but we had two more monkeys in the mix. Between home and camps and the pool and the beach and grocery shopping and boredom and reading and missed naps and the park and dinners and a visit from Nana and more missed naps - I didn't have much time to chronicle it all! So here's one mega post for her 7th month birthday. Happy 7 months baby girl!

"See that camera? I wanna eat it. See mama's hand? I wanna eat it. See everything? I want to eat it all!" Chiquita is full tilt into using her taste buds to gauge the world. If she can't move it to her mouth, her mouth moves towards it. It is quite drooly, but very cute (in a "I'm her mama and don't mind her spit" kinda way). 

Teething only adds to her oral fixation. This month two of her bottom teeth popped up. They are completely adorable (until she's breast feeding and suddenly decides to chomp down - um, ouch!). We've added frozen teething rings into her daily rotation, but she still prefers gumming fingers instead.

See her sleeping on her own? This is rare.

One of the biggest challenges we face is codependence. Ripley is very much a mama's girl and still only really sleeps on me or near me. When she was born I didn't mind that she always wanted to be in arms, I needed her close. But, unlike a lot of babies I've met, she really never wanted to be put down. I so wanted to take pictures of her curled up in infant sweetness. However, no matter how heavy she got, as soon as I would lay her down she'd cry. I would try to soothe her and reassure her that I was near, but nope, she wouldn't have it. She is also a very light sleeper, which means that if I do happen to slip away while she sleeps, she'll wake up after a few minutes and search for me.

When pregnant I read that you can't spoil a baby before 4 months. A young baby has no ability to manipulate, so if they cry, go ahead and pick them up. All of a sudden she's 7 months old and I definitely know that she cries because she wants me to grab her. She is very vocal about her wants. Very vocal. And of course, as soon as she's in my arms, she's either smiling, or back to sleep. So somewhere between 4 months and now she's grasped the routine and refuses to let it go.

Here we are, 7 months in and she co-sleeps with me and takes naps in my arms. Which means, for 2-4 hours in the day and from 8pm (ish) on, I am immobile. Occasionally she falls asleep in the car seat on the way home (score!), but it's fairly rare. Twice I've been out of the house and she's slept without me (after super tantrums that wear her out), so we know it's possible (see above photo for proof).

It seems strange to me that there are only two methods I hear about. Co-sleeping and Crying-it-out. Most parents I've talked to admit that they tried the ol' cry cry method, but really ended up co-sleeping until 1, 2, 3 or 6 years old. The only crib sleepers I know of are the babies who were naturally inclined to sleep on their own since birth. Once again here I am, faced with the old "all babies are different" mantra. Why don't they just preach that to all pregnant mamas? All babies are not the same - so stop trying to fit yours into the mold.

My train of thought is this: Babies have been co-sleeping for centuries. Primitive cultures and most animals don't expect their babies to be all quiet and asleep for hours on their own until they're more self reliant. This is such a western concept. So while yes, I would like more time during the day and I would love my bed back to just D and I, I am not ready to listen to her wail and watch her pull her hair and scratch at her face just because she wants to be near me. If I had a 9-5 and she absolutely had to learn independence, then yes, I would try harder, but for now I will be the calming comfort in her world. (This may be where all my parenting regrets can be traced back to in the future). Moving on...

There she is - Queen of the bed.

One of the best things that has happened this month is the giggle. She would kind of chuckle before, and definitely smile lots, but now she has a full on giggle. Her brothers are the silliest and funniest things in her universe - they always get her laughing. Good thing it's summer because there is a lot of time for them to entertain her. 

Now that she doesn't scream bloody murder when we put her into the car seat, we can actually take her with us almost everywhere. Besides everyday tasks like grocery shopping and Target (Oh yes! Target, the God o' suburbia, at which we worship once, twice, maybe three times a week. Seriously - who needs that much stuff from Target? Everybody!) we also get to do fun stuff, like swim tryouts for Boo.

Cheering her brother on at Junior Lifeguard tryouts.

Car seat lovin' also means it's much less stress to take her to her doctor's appointments. This time when we were there we happened to run into her lactation nurse. The nurse was so surprised at Ripley's growth. After months and months of worrying about my milk supply and her weight loss - here she is, gigantor baby! The nurse was thoroughly impressed. So was the doctor who gaged her height and weight at 97% and 96%. It's no wonder chiquita doesn't fit into any 6 month clothing - she is definitely onto 9 month and 12 month sizes. 

All smiles even after horrible shots.

Another thing that's growing like crazy is her hair. She has some serious baby-fro after her bath. When it dries it has a mind of its own. I know there's a haircut in her future, but I kinda wanna just see where it goes.

She may or may not be related to Kramer from Seinfeld.

Sunday mornings are a favorite around here. It's the one day a week that the chiquita can lounge with her brothers while they watch cartoons. Z loves to be cozy and always has a blanket or two in tow. He brings out his red fuzzy one so much that we call it the Red Ghost (it gobbles him up!). Since his sister has become less fragile he loves to bring out blankets and stuffed animals for her too. And sometimes the Red Ghost gobbles them both up!

The Red Ghost strikes again!

When the monkeys are with their bioMom, the three of us go on our own adventures. Friend having a birthday? During happy hour? With a loud band? No worries. We have that covered.

My little Princess Leia head :)

We also celebrated her first Father's Day. Since the monkeys are older, D spent most of the day on the golf course with them. However, chiquita got plenty of daddy time before and after.

They kinda like each other.

More proof that she tolerates the car seat. D and I not only get lunch dates, we actually have a chance to eat before she gets fidgety!

Chiquita still adores her bath time, which has evolved into Daddy/daughter time. The two of them get to splash around together while mama gets a break (usually just enough time to inhale dinner). We've been using the bath sponge, but lately all she wants to do is flip around. I think a bath seat is the next up on our cleanliness journey.

This was the first picture got to take of her teeth (without her tongue playing with them). We had about a week or two of super drool and baby pain medicine, but once they popped she was all good.

The majority of my afternoons look like this:

Before the girls were born D and I had discussed who we'd want to be their guardians if anything should ever happen to us. It's quite the process to go through your family and friends and think of not only who would be great care takers, but who would have the time, resources, desire and ability to commit, not only to your children, but to your whole family. Parenting is a crazy thing. Sure almost anyone can go off and procreate after puberty, but being able to make a child doesn't automatically mean you have the ability to raise it. We wanted to know that the girls would be loved and raised by people we respect and already consider family.

We made our decision, but then life got in the way. You know, the whole two babies, doctors, marriage, trips, doctors, holidays, doctors, one baby, birth, new baby sort of thing. Finally we got the chance to invite our choice into the family- and they said yes! Los Padrinos: David & Lorena.

Since she grows out of clothes so quickly it's hard to get attached to outfits. There are the few here and there that are so cute they stick with you. It's always a sad day when those have to retire. Cheers to my favorite strawberry romper. You are adorable.

Ripley's Nana came to visit this month too. She hadn't been out since Mia's memorial in the end of January. It was so wonderful to have her here for a bit. She also got an extra gold star from me cause she's the only person so far that thinks Chiquita looks like me.

Nana learning the power of the new teeth.

Splashing about makes her hungry.

In general I feel like our life (especially after 3pm) is hectic. D has work and meetings, the boys have camps and junior life guards, plus there's tutoring and reading/study time to keep their brains sharp. And of course dinner has to happen somewhere. Controlled chaos. Despite the busy schedules I feel like every now and again the universe slows, we find ourselves without an agenda, and we get to have a casual afternoon with family and friends. Those are always the best days.

Uncles are good at lego construction.

Uncles are also good at baby bouncing.

(just before Rip got pegged by a foul ball! Poor girl is gonna be tough)

She loves all animals (especially ones with long ears to grab!)

Did I mention that Leeloo loves her brothers? Because she LOVES her brothers. She loves them so much, that if they come home and go into their room for a bit without playing with her first,  she will yell until they come back out. She doesn't cry, she actually yells at them to come back. Good thing they like to play with her. I have a feeling that she'll charm them into doing a lot for her.

Here's a better look at those new teeth:

Feeding the baby cereal and fruit is fun. Giving her her solid cookies that require chewing as well as swallowing? That's a little more daunting. In my mind I know that the cookie is engineered to be super soluble, but I hold my breath a little hoping that she won't choke. I thought it was a first-time mama worry until I saw D break up the baby cookie into itty bitty pieces. Just one more thing to add to our over-protective list. So far she's swallowed a couple of pretty big chunks and coughed a few times, but I think she's getting the gist of this chewing thing. Sigh - I must repeat - the universe is not out to get us.

She's still working on the whole "food goes inside the mouth" thing.

Ripley met my Jeffery for the first time this month too. He was the Best-Man-of-Honor at our wedding, and we lived together for years before I moved to California. He moved to San Diego right after I did, and we used to tromp around together all the time. However, since I got pregnant and live in suburbia we don't get to see each other that often anymore. Lucky for us he came up for lunch a couple of weeks ago. Yay for Uncle Jeff!

Once again, these two love each other:

Part of our month was dedicated to selling Pop's house and moving Grandma Mimi out. It's the end of an era. D and his siblings grew up in Del Mar and have known that house for most of their lives. It's sad to know that we won't have anymore holidays or Sundays there. Luckily a young couple fell in love with it and want to keep it as is (instead of demolishing it for new construction - the fate of most houses in that area). So, even though it's sold, it will be there, holding the memories for us.

Mornings and afternoons are fairly chill around here. The little one and I just hang out and play or read or try new things - like sitting!

My brother and his family also came for a visit. We headed downtown to a very busy Old Spaghetti Factory to meet them for dinner. She absolutely loves being in busy places. She also hung out for the very first time sitting in the highchair. So very grown up!

It's hard to take good pictures in a dark restaurant!

Whew! Mega super post! I definitely need to write more regularly so I don't have to play catch up! Here's one last giggle video. Happy 7 months Ripley!